Two months

September 17 marked my 2-month anniversary of my relationship ending. My palms still sweat when I think about what my life looked like at this time last year and what it looks like now.

The comfort of my former home, of my own space and own kitchen. The comfort of knowing that someone was always there waiting for me (even though he had emotionally checked out by this time last year and began traveling solo a lot). The comfort of routine.

Break ups are not easy. Not only does it take an emotional toll on the two parties involved, but it has a ripple effect on all aspects of life.

The thing to remember is that the pain and discomfort is temporary. It’s not going to last forever (thankfully). And when the pain starts to go away you feel relief, gain clarity, and are grateful.

I’ve gotten there. I’m SO excited to say that it’s only take me 2 months (almost literally to the day) to get there. And boy oh boy does it feel good.

Love Update
When I ended my almost 4-year relationship I jumped right back into the dating field. Online profiles put up, men who reached out through FB got a date, and I exuded my “say yes to everything” mentality in everything I did. I had the time of my life!

Happy hours with girlfriends, first (and sometimes second) dates, coffee with old friends… I entertained distractions from wherever I could get them and it completely helped with my mourning.

And then, right around my mom’s birthday (September 14) I decided that I was done with the distraction/grieving and needed to get my life in order. Finances, fitness, routine, living situation… all of it needed to be organized. This Type A gal was done living by her bootstraps.

They always say, when you stop looking it happens. And it did. If only temporarily, I felt what it felt like to be happy again. 

Dad update
Unless you’re new around here you’d know that my dad is battling Stage 3A Lung Cancer. He started strong in his battle – ready to tackle the disease and rid himself of the pain.

This journey has been trying. His patience is wearing thin and he’s tired of fighting. Although he’s not thrown in the towel, I’m grateful that he only has one more chemo treatment before “we wait” and see what the tests say.

I’m grateful to work in an organization that has taught me patience. To take his pain and his yelling and know that it’s not directed at me, it’s just he needs to get it out. Although it’s not easy to constantly be the punching bag (since he doesn’t have many others to take it out on) I’m grateful that he trusts me enough to let it out and let his guard down.

One thing is for sure – my dad and I have grown tremendously close throughout this entire process. And after years of our relationship dwindling thanks to differences I’m not going to discuss here, things are back to the way they should be.

Now, peace out cancer.

Blog update
I miss blogging. And I know I’ve said that so many times in the past. But, using this blog is my form of therapy. To write things out on “paper” and share them with you guys for feedback, encouragement, sometimes constructive criticism, and to celebrate the good and the bad.

Consistency with it is my downfall. Between building up my girlfriendships, a budding romantic relationship, being a fur-mom, and trying to reach some big personal goals I find it a challenge to make time to sit down and share with you.

I’m not going to promise consistency. I’m not going to promise a weekly post. But, I do promise to share with you guys from time to time how life is going – the good, bad, and ugly.

So there you have it. 2 months later and this old girl is still truckin’ along.